She came to us with hopes of stopping what she now recognized as her “habit.”
She was lonely, she confessed. She had become a master at tempting men at her workplace and meeting them in various locations, including their cars.
We could throw her in a category. But none of us are exempt from the temptation and lure of illicit sex.
Comedians and sitcoms joke about unfaithfulness. But that would fall flat to those limping back to marital health after an affair. The undertow sucks in kids. Friends. Extended family.
Affairs promise freedom from responsibility. The infatuation and the secrecy are exciting, like they were for the woman we met that day.
But they’re never lasting. Decisions to have an affair are generally one choice at a time toward it. Thinking through these decisions helps us stop it in the thought stage before it becomes an action.
Infidelity isn’t just about sex, passion, or attraction. It’s also deception, manipulation, and betrayal.
God will never send us someone else’s spouse or ask us to go find another one. We can’t run to sin and to God. God doesn’t bless sin. Sin blindfolds us, rendering us oblivious to the extent of its damage.
If you’ve found yourself sharing spouse-level-only conversations, or mentally wandering to another, or testing the waters of a physical relationship, may I offer you something a true friend would tell you?
Restoration in your marriage is possible. Own your sin. We’ve seen what seemed like impossible challenges resolved through transparent, open communication, and taking steps to rebuild trust through time and consistent proof. Never underestimate the power of surrendering your marriage to God.
It’s one step at a time back home.
THE GOOD STUFF: Let your eyes look directly forward, and your gaze be straight before you. Ponder the path of your feet; then all your ways will be sure. Do not swerve to the right or to the left; turn your foot away from evil. (Proverbs 4:25-27)
ACTION POINTS: Put into place 3-4 strategies you will do as a couple to protect your marriage. (Example: We’ll not meet with someone of the opposite sex privately. We’ll keep our personal devices open to each other. We’ll keep our conversations private, and talk about big and small stuff with each other.)
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